Well completed

The well in Guinea is finished! For me this is the perfect Christmas gift, something that is a blessing to others. I had been thinking lately a lot about how we give gifts to each other for Jesus birthday, and again to ourselves for our birthday. So this is, for me, the perfect present - something that shows the love of Christ to others.

I would also like to take this opportunity to say

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

I have not had the energy to send Christmas cards this year, but I truly do wish each and everyone a wonderful Christmas filled with joy, the joy that comes from knowing our amazing God. Even though this has been the hardest, most heart breaking year imaginable - I have still seen the goodness of the Lord. He has sustained me and my family, and most important, it is because of the birth of Jesus, and the salvation that His coming brought, that I know without any doubt that John and Chris are with the Lord. They both loved the Lord. I can't wait to be with them, but until that day I will do my best to serve Him.

Blessing to all of you, and again Merry Christmas

Your not shaken

I am sinking in the river that is raging
I am drowning
Will I ever, rise to breathe again
I wanna know why
I just wanna understand
Will I ever know why?
How could this be from Your hand?


When every little thing that I have dreamed would be
just slips away like water through my hands
And when it seems the walls of my beliefs are crashing down
like they’re all made of sand
I won’t, let go of You now
because I know, oh, You’re not shaken

I am trembling in the darkness of my own fear
All the questions with no answers
So grip me while I’m here
And I may never know why
Oh I may not understand
But I will lift up my eyes,
and trust this is Your plan

When I am in the valley
of the shadow of death
You’re not shaken

You're right here beside me and
You have never left
You're not shaken

He held back the rain

As we traveled to Oregon to spend Thanksgiving with Dan and Nisha, it had weighted so heavy on my heart the other task at hand. It was time to take John and Chris's ashes to the San Juan Islands to spread them. I had felt it was time to do this, and even though it seemed foolish to try and do it on such a short trip (we covered over 2000 miles in 5 days) somehow I knew it was the right time.

God showed up in a magnificent way, at least for me it was like He spoke His peace and approval over this sad and painful task. For many days the San Juan's had stormy weather. It had been raining continuously through Thursday, but on Friday as we traveled from Portland to the Islands, it seemed as if the clouds parted as we went. I thought, God, will you really grant me this request, that it be a wonderfully beautiful day. It had seemed in so many ways that God had been silent to my prayers, the reason for this trip being evidence of that. As we arrived to take the water taxi to the Island, the sky continued to clear, by the time we arrived it was so clear hardly a cloud was in the sky. The place we were to spread the ashes is a small rock island visible from my father-in-laws cabin, which overlooks the ocean. As we arrived on this small rock by boat, it was truly a beautiful sight. Dan, Nisha, Miheala, Chuck, Sue, Carolyn and myself walked the area spreading their ashes. When it was completed, although like Dan said, it was hard to believe we were there doing what we were doing, there was a gentle breeze that seemed to breath God's love and peace. As I looked around I realized that God had spoken and was speaking, it was a personal love message that it was alright, He has been and was listening to my heart.

That night the rain and wind came once again. I know God cleared the day just for us, He answered the desire of my heart for that time, and then further proved it was Him by bringing back the rain when we were done.

Plaques are down the hill from Chucks cabin, a place of remembrance. I hope I never forget just how faithful God was as He held back the clouds and rain so we could have a beautiful day to remember such wonderful men of God, who we miss so much, but know we will see again.

A Well

It is not usually my desire to share about how my family has given, John and I always felt very strongly that if we gave it would be anonymously. It helped us make sure our hearts were in the right place and that all the glory would go to the Lord. But I am going to make an exception, and share about how the money Chris had saved is being used by the Lord to be a blessing.

Chris was an amazing saver, he had a significant amount of money in his bank. Many years ago he had felt through the words of another the call to go to Africa, and especially to be somehow involved in "water wells". We did not know what the meant, but thought he would use his engineering skills to possibly help to one day drill wells somewhere in Africa. In some ways that made his leaving us before this was accomplished confusing, but God has a way of redeeming. This week the beginnings of that desire of Chris's is being lived out.

A village in Guinea, a African country our fellowship has adopted as a ministry, and where Mihaela went last summer, has begun drilling a water well that will be funded from Chris's savings. This village did not have a well of its own, they had to obtain water outside the village. I do not know all the details yet but I do know the people are very excited, and I am too. As much as it hurts, wishing Chris was doing this himself, I can see how God is using him to bless others in His name. The people will know it is because of Jesus and a young mans love of Jesus, that this well is being drilled.

I share this mostly so that you will pray for this well, that it will come in with clean water, and that when the villagers drink of it, it will be like the water that Jesus tells about, the water that is salvation. They will turn to our Lord and desire to know Him, the one who loves them and used His child Chris to be a blessing to them.

Let the Waters Rise

This song is beautiful and so accurately reflects my heart.

Poly sophomore who lost battle with cancer this summer remembered as inspiration to others

Poly sophomore who lost battle with cancer this summer remembered as inspiration to others

Quiet

Quiet, that is the word that describes my heart right now. I know it has been along time, over a month since I have posted, honestly I have just not been able to really articulate anything. I have felt a need to just be still, to try and hear the Lord's voice in the midst of my rambling mind. Even though my body has been quiet, my mind has been a whirl of thoughts, memories and sometimes overwhelming confusion. But I feel OK with that, I think for the most part it is just part of the process. Our pastor has equated what our family has gone through with Post-traumatic Stress Syndrome, I think there maybe some similarity, not to in anyway minimalism what our brave soldiers encounter in the war theater.

Earlier this month I visited Dan and Nisha in Chicago. They were there to take care of some business Nisha had with her apartment. It was such a wonderful time. I really enjoyed being shown around Chicago by Dan, we visited Museums and other "tourist" attractions. I had never had the opportunity to spend time with just Dan, and I found I so enjoyed his company, it was in many ways like I discovered my son in a new way, the man he has become. I think it brought some healing for us both also, just being able to casually talk about things and encourage each other. We took in a couple of shows, Jersey Boys and The Blue Man Group. Both were a lot of fun, Blue Man Group was very strange, very abstract.

I have been starting to seek the Lord on what is next for my life. I just started volunteering in a first grade class room in a neighboring town. I think I am going to really enjoy it. There is something about knowing that your helping children be successful. They are mostly Spanish speaking so need a lot of help with reading English. I loved their smiles when I would compliment them on how well they did reading to me. I've also been working on some much needed freshening up of the house. Painting the inside and also some of the outside. I love how the inside is looking, a little bit of color really makes a difference.

I want to thank everyone for caring so much about our family. Our journey continues, as does yours. Our God is amazing, in the midst of the hardest things you can imagine He is there, using it for His glory, giving His comfort and bring us through the storm. What is next here on this earth, I don't know, but I do know what is coming! Life eternal with those that have gone before us, and especially our Lord. I can honestly say I can't wait, but until that day, I will praise His name.